blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

So I can either bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

nick nO THAT’S NOT HOW YOU BAKE COOKIES FRIEND

FLOOR IT?

NICK NO

HOW ABOUT 4,000,000 DEGREES FOR 1 SECOND

NICK YOU ARE GOING TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN

I’M GOING TO HARNESS THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES

NICK P L E A S E

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


vetoing:

when you finally receive an ask during one of those ask games

image

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)



clientsfromhell:

Me: “What browser are you on?”

Client: “Google.”

Me: “Google Chrome?”

Client: “No, just regular Google.”

Me: “That’s the site. I want to know the browser.”

Client: “Google.”

Me: “No.”

Client: “Look, we can have this conversation forever, man. But when I hit the internet logo, Google comes up!”

Me: “Okay…What does that “internet logo” look like?

Client: “…A fiery fox, I guess. But that’s irrelevant.”

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


injuries:

i honestly love getting messages from you guys so much it makes my day even if you’re just saying hi or something it’s nice to know you’re acknowledging my existence 

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


Ask me about my body. (¬‿¬)

Hair: What hair color looks best on you and what's your natural color?
Skin: Do you tan easily?
Eyes: What is your favorite show to watch?
Nose: What is your favorite perfume/candle fragrance?
Mouth: Do you want to kiss anyone right now?
Tongue: What was in your last meal?
Windpipe: Do you sing?
Neck: Do you wear necklaces?
Ears: How many piercings do you have (if any)?
Cheeks: Do you blush easily?
Wrists: Have you ever broken a bone?
Hands: Are you an artist/writer?
Fingers: Do you play an instrument?
Heart: Are you in love? If so, does the one you love know?
Lungs: Do you smoke cigarettes?
Chest: Are your maternal/parental instincts strong?
Stomach: Do you feel confident in your body image?
Back: Are you a virgin?
Hips: Do you like to dance?
Thighs: Has anyone ever called you fat or ugly?
Knees: Have you ever cheated on someone?
Ankles: Have you ever been arrested?
Feet: Favorite pair of shoes?
Brain: Anything you want to ask

Full Moon Dates for 2014

till-the-end-of-the-bucky:

padalocked-up:

darkenedstiles:

wizardsdemigodsandtributes:

cmtilney:

she-snake:

thepinkowl:

January 15th
February 14th
March 16th
April 15th
May 14th
June 12th
July 12th
August 10th
September 8th
October 8th
November 6th
December 6th

for my followers who are werewolves

for my followers who are dating werewolves

to all my followers that want to avoid werewolves

for all my followers who want to become werewolves

for all my followers who hunt werewolves

For Stiles Stilinski

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


katsallday:

selonian:

parahsalmer:

sociallyawkwardriot:

ehretha:

EVERY Target shopper NEEDS to know this:
If the price ends in 8, it will be marked down again.
If it ends in a 4, it’s the lowest it will be.
Target’s mark down schedule:
MONDAY: Kids’ Clothing, Stationery (office supplies, gift wrap), Electronics.
TUESDAY: Women’s Clothing and Domestics.
WEDNESDAY: Men’s Clothing, Toys, Health and Beauty.
THURSDAY: Lingerie, Shoes, Housewares.
FRIDAY: cosmetics

WHOOOOA. Will keep in mind!

THIS IS THE GREATEST INFORMATION I HAVE EVER LEARNED FROM TUMBLR.


filed under: important information that everyone needs to know

BRB DOING THIS TODAY

katsallday:

selonian:

parahsalmer:

sociallyawkwardriot:

ehretha:

EVERY Target shopper NEEDS to know this:

If the price ends in 8, it will be marked down again.

If it ends in a 4, it’s the lowest it will be.

Target’s mark down schedule:

MONDAY: Kids’ Clothing, Stationery (office supplies, gift wrap), Electronics.

TUESDAY: Women’s Clothing and Domestics.

WEDNESDAY: Men’s Clothing, Toys, Health and Beauty.

THURSDAY: Lingerie, Shoes, Housewares.

FRIDAY: cosmetics

WHOOOOA. Will keep in mind!

THIS IS THE GREATEST INFORMATION I HAVE EVER LEARNED FROM TUMBLR.

image

filed under: important information that everyone needs to know

BRB DOING THIS TODAY

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


officialwhitegirls:

people born in december 1999 be like i miss the 90’s 

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


sextspert:

superwholock-at-hogwarts:

chevvybar:

hiddlestalker:

lifehackable:

More Life Hacks Here

Day 1: you ripped open my vagina and I hate you
Day 5: just kidding you’re so cute and soft and small lol I could fit you in a handbag
Month 2: STOP CRYING PLEEEAASE. JUST ONE HOUR OF SLEEP AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVERRRR
Month 5: mama? Mama? Mama? Say it? Please? Say something? Please
Month 8: IF. YOU. DON’T. STOP. SAYING. MAMA. THE. POLICE. WILL. NEVER. FIND. THE. BODY.
Year 1: One down. 17 to go…
Year 1, Month 11: oh god.. it’s coming…
Year 2: NO PLEASE JUST PUT THAT DOWN. NNOOO! DON’T TOUCH THAT! Baby, i love you no matter whaT BUT PLEASE DON’T TOUCH THAT JJUST STAY STILL PLEASE SWEETHEART
Year 3: Oh thank god that’s over
Year 4: Awwww, you went to preschool. isn;t that adorable, my little intellectual shit
Year 5: ACTUAL SCHOOL! YOU LEARNED COLORS AND NUMBERS YOU’RE A GENIUS

Year 15: You called me a fuckwit. What the fuck is a fuckwit?

year 16; oh god no LIGHTLY step on the gas NO NON NO NO YOU DONT HAVE TO PRESS THAT HARD ON THE BREAK!!!

year 17: I caught you masturbating but you didn’t notice so I didn’t say anything. You’re welcome.

sextspert:

superwholock-at-hogwarts:

chevvybar:

hiddlestalker:

lifehackable:

More Life Hacks Here

Day 1: you ripped open my vagina and I hate you
Day 5: just kidding you’re so cute and soft and small lol I could fit you in a handbag
Month 2: STOP CRYING PLEEEAASE. JUST ONE HOUR OF SLEEP AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVERRRR
Month 5: mama? Mama? Mama? Say it? Please? Say something? Please
Month 8: IF. YOU. DON’T. STOP. SAYING. MAMA. THE. POLICE. WILL. NEVER. FIND. THE. BODY.
Year 1: One down. 17 to go…
Year 1, Month 11: oh god.. it’s coming…
Year 2: NO PLEASE JUST PUT THAT DOWN. NNOOO! DON’T TOUCH THAT! Baby, i love you no matter whaT BUT PLEASE DON’T TOUCH THAT JJUST STAY STILL PLEASE SWEETHEART
Year 3: Oh thank god that’s over
Year 4: Awwww, you went to preschool. isn;t that adorable, my little intellectual shit
Year 5: ACTUAL SCHOOL! YOU LEARNED COLORS AND NUMBERS YOU’RE A GENIUS

Year 15: You called me a fuckwit. What the fuck is a fuckwit?

year 16; oh god no LIGHTLY step on the gas NO NON NO NO YOU DONT HAVE TO PRESS THAT HARD ON THE BREAK!!!

year 17: I caught you masturbating but you didn’t notice so I didn’t say anything. You’re welcome.

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


I’m an adult, but not like a real adult
anyone between the ages of 18 and 25 (via dianajennifere)

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


prozdvoices:

Anonymous said:

Hey dude I love your dramatic readings. Anyway, can you read the name of every state in America in the most seductive way possible? In alphabetical order please.

what the fuck

Why

Well, OKAY.

Saying the Names of All 50 States in Alphabetical OrderSeductively

image

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


shisno:

grandpaharleys:

i dont understand the stereotype that women are obsessed with shoes, like have u ever met a high school boy

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


pleasestopbeingsad:

things life is too short for:
- hating yourself
- pretending to laugh at “jokes” that are actually just bigoted statements
- not singing along to your favorite songs
- waiting hours to text someone back just to look cool
- bad coffee
- bad books
- mean people
- body shaming
- letting other people dictate your life
- larry’s storyline

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)


myawkwardnessisnatural:

Sources close to the situation, which requested to remain anonymous, leaked the story to a reporter about the case as early as Sunday morning, saying that a female employee, who was claiming sexual harassment by her supervisor, who just happened to be named ‘Michael,’ had ‘spiked large batches of the drink with top soil she had been bringing to work,’ via her purse.  She did so after discovering that all batches she was put in charge of would be added to two-million 20-ounce bottles which would be labeled “Share a Coke with…Michael.” Coca-Cola said that the unidentified employee had filed harassment documentation against the supervisor, whose name is also being withheld due to the ongoing criminal investigation, and told co-workers that her complaint had been ignored. Another Coca-Cola employee, also female, stated anonymously that the women in the Atlanta, Georgia bottling plant ‘are treated like objects on a regular basis.’

“The young woman who had contaminated the drinks, in my opinion, deserves to be fired and face criminal charges, even though she was wrongfully driven to commit the act,” said the employee. “The people, the customers, do not deserve to drink dirt, that was absurd. That being said, we should be thankful it wasn’t something more dangerous she put into the bottles.” (x)

Well.

(via saladinthehauntedtardis)